5 Ways to Bounce Back From a Bad Relationship

5 Ways to Bounce Back From a Bad Relationship

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  1.          We have all been there.  Fresh out of a break up with no clue on what to do next.  Living on the rebound can be a difficult task for most but there are ways to keep yourself out of depression, away from making the same mistakes all over again, and ready for new adventures. Here are five very important ways:

     

    5.   Do NOT Call Your "ex-ex".  You know, that certain someone that happened to be around before you and your most recent love split?  Give yourself some time, and lots of it, before you start announcing your new "single-dom" to all the ones that got away.  Making those phone calls simply add a distraction from reality.  Don’t postpone your healing.  Trust me, the old flames can smell you (Mr/Miss Rebound) coming a mile away.  By all means save yourself some grief and put the phone down.  When the nights get cold and lonely, curl up with a good DVD and call it a night!

    4.     Don’t Dwell On It.  Talk to mom.  Yell with friends.  Have your final venting sessions.  Then shut up.  The more you talk about your nasty break-up, the more it lives.  The more you stir it up the worse it can get.  Give yourself a time limit.  How long is too long to give this situation all,most, or even any of your energy. Once that time is up,  pull the plug.  Don’t bring it up to friends, Tell Dad your are doing just fine and cut the emotional FaceBook status’.  By this time the world will be over the drama, as should you!

    3.     Acknowledge & Admit YOUR faults.  In break-ups, especially the really bad ones, you should never view the relationship as time wasted.  The past should only be known as lessons learned.  Through ALL the post-relationship arguments with the ex, crying with friends and family, and angry text messages, you should now have figured out some facts.  Was the break-up anyone’s fault?  What was the deal breaker? What could I have done that may have changed the outcome?  Sure pointing the finger is the easy part especially if your were the victim, however there may have been some times that you were the bad guy.  Find those instances!  Even if you were cheated on, there can still be some things that you said or did that were out of character or even out of pocket.  Once you identify your faults you can forgive yourself and become a better person for a better person!

    2.     Find YOUR happy!  When involved in serious relationships people tend to lose themselves.  You spend all your time and effort trying to make yourself be what you think the relationship needs.  Although sacrifice is extremely important, you must sacrifice in moderation.  Lots of people break-up because one person bent themselves until they broke.  When this happens you leave the relationship broken, lingering outside of yourself.  This is not something that another relationship or person can fix.  You have to work on yourself and find your happy again!  Date yourself. Do things alone or with your children and family.  You have to be happy and whole alone, to be someone’s better half.  Take your single life very seriously and map it out.  Take time to love yourself and really learn how you want and need to be loved.  If you don’t know how to love you, how is someone else supposed to know?

    1.      Forgive, and don’t give up.   The thing about forgiveness is that it is more for you than the person you are forgiving.  Without forgiveness you can be eaten alive by our own thoughts.  This is probably the number one tool you can use to get over a past relationship.  You have to forgive others and you must forgive yourself in order to move on completely.  Think of it as stepping out of that old damaged self and into a shiny new self, all heeled and wonderful.  Once you are again happy with life you can begin a new one and avoid becoming bitter.  This is the part where you let go! Do not confuse letting go with forgetting.  Remember the past so that you don’t repeat it.  Let go of the past to ensure a brighter future.  The last thing you want ever want to do is carry all that old baggage into a new relationship.  It’s heavy and can easily and quickly ruin things.  Step lightly, let go and be you, the born again real you!

     

    Go With Love.     

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