Aren men who abuse their partners all socially inept or violent in all their relationships?
It is a common misconception that the batterer treats people outside the abusive relationship the same as he does his partner. This is typically not the case. Many batterers exhibit a Jekyll-and-Hyde personality. Batterers can be quite charming and delightful when they want to be. This is how so many women get pulled into these relationships. Finally, the batterer may seem loving and attentive. Eventually, his behavior becomes abusive. The split personality of the batterer my contribute to the myth that battered women are mentally unstable if they choose to stay in an abusive relationship. If a woman gathers the courage to reach out to a friend, family member, or coworker, and that person has seen only the charming side of the batterer, the listener may find the woman’s stories of abuse and terror difficult to accept. People in whom she confides may experience disbelief and think there is something wrong wit her. It is noteworthy that a batterer’s behavior outside the abusive relations
