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Does AOL really eat puppies, kittens and babies?

AOL babies EAT kittens puppies
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Does AOL really eat puppies, kittens and babies?

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What a crazy notion, to think that this question has come up more than twenty or thirty-thousand times is just so ridiculous. But it has, and we’re forced to answer. We work very long hours at AOL to provide you with the level of customer service you expect at the price you’re willing to pay. We have to cut corners somewhere and that “somewhere” is on our catering. Yes, we eat kittens, puppies and stillborn baby humans. But we do all this to keep the price at rock-bottom lows for you, our infallable consumer.

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*Sadly, we had to bring back ads too. Hopefully more targeted.