How was the BS responsible for the trouble in the relationship prior to infidelity happening?
Submitted by DLee A: While a betrayed spouse is NEVER responsible for the choice their partner made to have an affair, they must hold themselves accountable for their share of responsibility for the state of the marriage leading up to the affair. It often appears that one partner is the “problem” in a relationship, while the other is blameless. This is simply not true. Assuming the betrayed spouse is a consenting adult with full mental and emotional capacities, he/she must be accountable for their role in an unhealthy relationship. Even if there is an imbalance of power in the relationship in favor of the wayward spouse, the betrayed spouse has allowed this dynamic to exist and possibly even perpetuated it. If both partners are committed to reconciling after an affair, the BS, once they have begun the healing process with the sincere effort and help of their WS, must begin to explore how they contributed to the marriage environment in which the affair took place. Some are obvious, such