If after being initiated and I still make a mistake like eating meat or having an evil thought, does it mean that Ill be disconnected from God or suffer some bad punishment?

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If after being initiated and I still make a mistake like eating meat or having an evil thought, does it mean that Ill be disconnected from God or suffer some bad punishment?

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M: Evil thought, you might not be able to control it immediately after enlightenment, because it’s just like the car brake, you see. When the car runs sixty miles an hour, and if you want to brake it, do it slowly, yeah. So, it’ll probably take some time to be able to purify completely yourself. But the meat you can avoid it, yeah, except when you don’t know it and you eat it by mistake, then that’s fine. But you have to meditate more on that day to clean that, because that is a very heavy karma. That’s what makes people ill, what makes our body suffer, and what makes us go to hell afterward to repay for the suffering of other beings.

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