Why people always talk about abusive relationship, but never abusive friendship?
I think some friendships can definately be abusive. There is a marvellous line in the film The Holiday starring Cameron Diaz and Kate Winslet, where Kate Winslet’s character turns to the boyfriend and says she doesn’t know what this “toxic” thing is between them but it is definately OVER! Some relationships can be very all-consuming and toxic in the sense that they are totally one sided. If one friend does all the work and all the giving and all the friendshipping and the other friend just sits back and enjoys it without giving any emotional feedback, then that is selfish and abusive. If a so-called friend speaks to another without kindness or respect, then that can be abusive too. Mother Teresa of Calcutta, before she died said something that has always stayed with me, it is this: “Let no-one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God’s kindness. Kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes and kindness in your smile.” If we are truly a friend
there are givers there are takers the takers are abusive some would say that there is balance here no there is not! run to the nearest counseling coach you need help.. people that are out going and full of life will draw to them the vampire takers of life… the takers feed off of the positive energy of the giver until they have used you up then they “hunt” for fresh energy …meat to drain taker can not live w/o the energy of the giver loving yourself or learning to love yourself will give you good radar that will not allow you to let anyone in your life that feeds on others….busy yourself with living life… for life does nothing but give to you every day you need to give to you.
Abuse is abuse, like I always say. And yes you can be in an abusive (so called friendship) when someone calls them your friend, but does not treat you with respect and verbally or physically lashes out, then yes. If you are feeling disturbed by your friendship, it is best you cut the ties. If you feel as if you can longer take their behavior, then it’s time to cut the ties. Years ago, I had a girlfriend ask me a question. The problem was, I was very angry at her for making a cold remark to me about 2 weeks earlier, and I had realized that she felt she could say anything to me without recourse (because even though I got mad, I didn’t talk to her about it) so, when I answered her, for the first time I said something hurtful back to her. She never spoke to me again. Now, If I had it to do over, now that I’m older, I would have told her right then and there she was being cold and rude. I knew she would have disagreed w/ me because she is kind of a selfish only thinks of herself kind of per
