What is shyness?
One definition of shyness is “having difficulty in creating a good rapport with the people one meets.” For some people, the problem of shyness may simply be having trouble thinking of things to say in social situations. For others, it may involve crippling physical manifestations of uneasiness. For most, shyness involves a combination of both symptoms to a greater or lesser degree. In any event, the effects of shyness can be devastating. Behaviors that come spontaneously for the average person (smiling, thinking of suitable conversational topics, assuming a relaxed posture, making good eye-contact, etc.) may simply not be an inherent part of the shy person’s makeup. Another problem of shyness is that shy people may not know how to behave in certain situations. Wrote Dr. Phillip G. Zimbardo, one of the country’s foremost authorities on the subject of shyness, “Some don’t have the social skills necessary for keeping the machinery of human relationships functioning smoothly. They don’t kn
The first information to be given about this matter is: Shyness is not a mental disorder. Why is it not a mental disorder? Because it does not fit some criteria like those that appear in the International Disease Classification, 10th Edition, by the World Health Organization, and in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 4th Edition, by the American Psychiatric Association. These criteria are related to the suffering, to incapacitation in the present time, or to the risk of aggravation. If Shyness is not a disorder, what is it then? Shyness can be explained in two ways. One is the common sense description of the signs and symptoms that are present in the person. The other is to explanation of what is happening in the person who suffers Shyness. You will enjoy this psychological suspense Common sense indicates that Shyness is a behavior pattern characterized by inhibition in some situations. It is a behavior pattern in which the person does not express (or expresses
Shyness is a label placed on us by others or ourselves. Labels do not explain a person, they place a person in a category and it is important to remember that labels and categories are not the person. Shyness is not the complete you. Your current way of being in the world resembles others who are introverted, sensitive, protective, caring, or deeply feeling. On one level shyness is a behavior and on another level shyness is an inner guide, an important part of you. To some people shyness has negative connotations and to others shyness is the root of compassion and creative introspection. For the purpose of this web site, Shyness is the emphasis of one part of us resulting in the limitation of our personal freedom and expression. Shyness can be also viewed as caring too much what others think of us. What is the difference between shyness, social anxiety, and insecurity? In reality, these terms are artificially created categories which help to understand behavior — the similarities bet
Outward Signs – One of the difficulties of being shy is that it is very often impossible to hide your shyness from other people. Signs of shyness include frequent trouble talking, stammering, stuttering, blushing, shaking, sweating hands.When these things start to happen, the shy person often becomes more upset and less able to deal with the current conversation or situation. Please keep in mind that these things happen to everyone sometimes. We all get nervous in new situations and then the more the nervousness is thought about, the more nervous we may become. Inward Signs – Many shy people have both inward and outward signs of shyness. However some people can act confident on the outside, but feel miserable on the inside. While these people act very self-assured on the outside, inside they have a racing heart and almost constant thoughts on how the conversation is going, how they look, if the other people in the room like them, and how quickly they can leave the situation and return
