When do parents think it is useful for children to have direct involvement in the mediation process?
Parents’ views were far ranging on this topic, divided mainly into perceived benefits for children in their own right and for the mediation process: When it will benefit children in their own right: General opinion was that direct consultation was useful whenever children in their own right would benefit from de-briefing about their experiences of the family separating and any conflict that had led the parents to mediation in the first place. Many made the distinction between this process and an ongoing counselling process, eg “It’s not about deep personal concerns, but about lifting a burden from their shoulders”. The effect that direct consultation had on their children was noticeable for many, for example: “They both came out happy – they were more themselves than they had been in ages.” “He was more open afterwards, bubbly and since he’s shown more insight into it all and understanding of what’s going on.” “It was totally invaluable for our son to have a place to debrief – after he
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