Which World Leaders Promote Velociraptor Safety and Awareness?
Dear Velociready— Which world leaders have an actual stance on • the threat of Velociraptor Domination? • the tyranny of the powerful Bacon Lobby which continues to put a stop to my bacon/raptor research? Your assistance in these matters is greatly appreciated. As I’m sure you are aware, we are running out of time. Sincerely, Dr. Peemkaew Dear Pemmican, The following world leaders have anti-raptor policies: • Winston Churchill • Nikita Khrushchev • Sayonara Tojo These leaders have pro-raptor policies: • Kim Il-Sung • Bill Pullman, who played the president in “Independence Day” According to Barb, who is always trying to rain down facts on my parade of happiness, all of the leaders listed above are now out of power, dead, or not real. I guess that means that velociraptor defense is in the hands of ordinary Joe the Plumbers and Tito the Neurosurgeonamancers. Wait, not Joe the Plumber. I hate that guy. The Bacon Lobby is financed by two of history’s greatest monsters, Bob Evans and the gho
