Do Dads Matter to Daughters?
I’m really struggling with the fact that I don’t verbalize how wonderful my daughters are often enough. I do tell them, but it does not flow spontaneously from my being. I don’t have the training or the modeling for it. I’ll say “good job!” But I also don’t want it to be “job.” You know—the idea that you have value because you did something. That has been my toughest thing. Maybe just sitting with them with my arm around them, maybe that’s telling them how special they are to me. I’m not sure. I have very little confidence about myself. In more than 25 years of talking and corresponding with thousands of men with daughters and stepdaughters, I’ve yet to meet one who made it through fathering without some serious doubts. But despite our doubts, the impact of a father or stepfather on his daughter is astounding. Many of us vaguely sense this reality, but don’t fully realize its meaning. First, having grown up as boys, we often can’t understand our daughters at all. Secondly, we often buy
